My Legs

The concert was very acclaimed - I suppose I should believe everyone and say: it was good. Of course, naturally there were things I would like to do better. Lots of things! I was happy with it, though.

You can see the programme now, available in two parts: page one, and page two. (requires Adobe Acrobat PDF reader)

I will be playing the same three Finissy Gershwin Arrangements in Berlin in two weeks. (As well as other works, of course!)

So now all we have is the famous Leg Issue. My legs hurt a lot after I play! Why is this?

Not immediately after, but when I have got back to wherever I am staying (my house, in this case). Then I am like a cripple. It's a bit of a mystery, but it will be gone quite soon - until next time!

Michael Finnissy was pleased with his concert. It was a good audience, and they were all listening very well. Howard Skempton was the nearest person - he, like all of them, so welcoming the music that I could only play better!

Lots of good composers under one roof! Quite memorable - for those who were participating - different for those who were slaving away at the piano - memorable in both ways though!

Any questions?

Nocturnal Activities

The night is very useful for concentration. All the distractions have gone to sleep with the sun, leaving us free to consider and toil. Daytime toil is hard work, but night-time endeavours are of a different sort. Think of sewing on buttons, mending socks, all the quiet labours of the nocturnal home.

You could also practise the piano.

Last night I found that the hours up to and after midnight were ideal for getting familiar with the many difficulties of Judith Weir's An Mein Klavier. When I say 'many' I mean it in the fullest sense of the word!

Now I have to go and do it again! Because it must be the best it can be for tomorrow's concert.

Wild Flowers

Don't say I never send you flowers!

Reliefs

Several things happened today. First of all, I turned my mobile phone from German language back to English again! I had put it into German so I could have some practise for when I play in Berlin soon . Since I had no time to actually learn German, I thought it would help a bit in place of that. However, there was always a very slight feeling of panic as I wondered what on earth button should I be pressing next, so consequently there is now relief. Back to English. For now!

Also I have finished and copied out my piano piece for Michael Finnissy's 60th birthday concert and celebration on Saturday 29th. This is also positive news, and of a more creative nature than the phone news!

I could show you the music now, but I have to save it for its world première. I'm sure if I published it here you would all be off to perform it in concerts all over the world! You naughties.

Well, I think I could be persuaded to put it up here somewhere. Soon!

Everything OK with you?

See you tomorrow.

Quiz

I took a test - so can you! Here is my result:

You Are Sunset

Even though you still may be young, you already feel like you've accomplished a lot in life. And you feel free to pave your own path now, and you're not even sure where it will take you. Maybe you'll pursue higher education in a subject you enjoy - or travel the world for a few years. Either way, you approach life with a relaxed, open attitude. And that will take you far!

What Time Of Day Are You?

I feel like it was right. Probably because I only notice the things I agree with and ignore the things that are not right! See if you can do the same!

Cat Milk

I've talked about whale milk before.

But in the supermarket round the corner from my house, they sell something called "Cat Milk". I always wondered what it is. Is it milk for cats, or milk from cats?

Someone else has had the same thought.

Why can I not tell if this is serious or not?

I mean, when it says "Goat Milk" it is milk from goats, not milk for goats.

Well, maybe I will never know...

On the day I see a cat going round the shop with its shopping list in its paws, I will finally understand!

Inspiring

Over the years, lots of people have stolen ideas from me! I don't mind; it is probably not really stealing, exactly, anyway.

I once had a special idea in a piece. It was only about another week before someone else had suddenly had the same idea. Then they later passed on this interest to a friend and soon there was a whole 'school' based on my idea!

I don't regard it as my idea, though. I don't own ideas. Even if I am the first to do something, I don't feel like I create anything. It just comes to me. I have to find it, I am the fisherman. I have to focus it. But that is just my brain working. But the brain is quite a limited wrinkly little organ without the magic special ingredient called...inspiration!

Inspiration is often spoken of, rather lightly or jokingly I feel. An estate agent told me I would appreciate living near the park because it would inspire me to create music. I found that a little bit far-fetched, since it came from an estate agent - someone whose main job is to take my money as quickly as he can, not to advise me on matters of the soul.

But it seems he was right after all. Today I went in the park to find out what kind of piano piece I am writing (for Michael Finnissy's sixtieth birthday) and it was very good to be somewhere more natural to do it. I'm sure there is a special reason for that. Anyway, it helped me to get my idea.

There have been other ideas before. Some of those, people "borrowed"! Sometimes it was a theft, sometimes an influence, sometimes a tribute. Really it is fine.

I suppose I should not be too harsh about this. I was inspired by certain things once - or shall we say, I admired them, and then copied them a little bit for a while, until one day I didn't need to copy anything any more. Maybe it is the same thing at work when I find something a little...familiar...about someone else's work. I suppose that is true. Why they picked me I do not know!

The thing is, if somebody genuinely stole something I came up with, it would be a little bit annoying, but it would not be a hopeless situation. Because I can get another idea. I know where to find inspiration - though I could still forget how, I suppose - and I can go there to find something else useful. But it might seem easier for someone to just borrow what is already existing. It probably is! But it shows a lack of confidence in themselves. Also it is a little bit mean or ungenerous. They are trying to get the maximum result for the minimum effort. If they believed in themselves more, they could contribute a lot! But I suppose they think they have to "fight their own corner", form their own style, make their own money, etc etc.

Well, I could say to them - hey! It's not your money, ideas, style, etc. It is OURS! We should be sharing it! If we like your idea though, we will be nice to you! So you don't have to worry that there will be no reward!

The word "inspiration" comes from Latin. It means to breathe in. I'm not sure why; I didn't invent the word. But it could be worth finding out what it means.

I guess some people already know there is no such thing.

But you and me, we know something different, don't we? My little friends!

Expert Expounds as Expected

Derek Mitchell, an international security expert, described the incidents outside the White House as " a huge embarrassment".

He added: "The Chinese wanted to beam back to Beijing pictures that are perfect. But most of the White House preparations of pomp and pageantry were poor."

Read it again: "The Chinese...beam back to Beijing/pictures that are perfect....preparations of pomp and pageantry were poor".

??

Is this deliberate?

b_ b_ to b_
p_ that are p_
p_of p_ and p_ are p_

??

Derek Mitchell, an international security expert, is either a bit of a media professional and thinks alliteration will Make his Message Memorable, or he is naturally blessed with poetic skills that he doesn't know about!

Tailoring Article

Here is an excellent article I read today. Written by Thomas Mahon of Savile Row, it describes what to look for in a bespoke tailor.

Read what he says at the end - what to look for and what to watch out for:

Don’t be convinced by the narcotic effect of labels, they mean nothing. Have your eyes and senses tuned. Don't trust the glossy magazines for your info, they are writers, not cutters. Their world is about PR, not about the actual stitching.

No journalist ever had to spend seven years as a proper tailor's apprentice. Their agendae are different from yours.

I think it would be unfortunate to describe a tailor's mind as 'cutting'. I mean, it would be unfortunately unintentionally unfunny. But I think these words are certainly very sharp.

I always admire anybody who knows their job. There are so few of them. But each is a genius in his field. Or approaching it.

The best will admit that they are very far indeed from this. But they might admit to being capable of something, occasionally.

What is the reason for writing about tailoring today?

1. I have been thinking about what musicians wear for performing. Including me, obviously.
2. Good information is always good and always helps us, no matter what it is about.

Learning is always possible, and I hope you will be able to learn something from the article.

Last of all, have a look at Mr. Sheppard's Shears.

Mister Men

Something strange is happening to the Mr. Men!

The Mr. Men is a series of children's books written in the 1970s by Roger Hargreaves, and published first in England. Roger died in 1988 so after that his son Adam carried on writing the books. He still does, but the whole Mr. Men "brand" was sold for a lot of money - so much that if you spent all the money on Mr. Men books and laid them out end to end, they would stretch round the earth five times! (They cost £2 each and I hope I worked that out right!)

Actually, they are worth more than that. They are very good.

I have two that were printed in the 1970s (because I was produced in the 1970s!): Mr. Sneeze and Mr. Funny. At that time, here were the other books you could get:


And, on the front, this is the kind of thing you would see:



Today, the only difference on the front covers is that the signature by Roger Hargreaves doesn't slope anymore. It is upright:

That's ok. Which do you prefer? (PS Mr. Silly looks funny, eh?)

The other changes are not so OK, in my opinion. First of all, look at what has happened to the back cover line-up of Mr. Men. They have all changed! Look at Mr. Funny and compare him with his picture above:



This is not the same Mr. Man! I don't think the colours came out right here, but one major difference is that his gloves aren't the right colour! Mr. Funny's body is green and his gloves are yellow. In the new picture his body and his gloves are green. Hmm, not good I think. Then look at the eyes. This is the most disturbing change. What is wrong with the eyes? Look at them! They are completely different now, and have no character! The bold lines of the original have been replaced by this hideous cosmetic surgery nightmare operation look. Maybe someone thinks he looks more human? Well, these days, perhaps that is true - when so many people in the public eye do have this weird plastic surgery/botox injection eye-look. Is that what it is? Has Mr. Funny had botox??? I don't believe it! He would never do that! This is the man who cheered up all the animals in the zoo when they had colds! But now they would have us believe that he is a fading star of the 70s, clinging on too long to his share of the spotlight and sinking ever deeper into a whirlpool of alcoholism like many before him (Krusty the Clown?)

Hmm. The Mr. Funny inside the books is the same one as before. Perhaps this back-cover image is some look-alike or impersonator they used for publicity material. Obviously Mr. Funny, like Saddam Hussein, is a person of such importance that he has many doubles for use in public work. I understand.

Having suggested that the insides of the books have not changed, I am afraid this is not true in the case of Mr. Dizzy. What on earth has happened to the images? They look like they have been scanned in by dogs. Or hamsters! (They find it harder to operate the mouse. Which wasn't supposed to be a joke. But I suppose you could see it as one if you want). Just look at Mr. Dizzy's edges:


Dear me. That's what it looks like in the book, I am afraid. Not good!

So you see, I am not completely happy with the state of the Mr. Men books today. But I can tell you: if you want to read them, they are all still with us, even if there is something strange on the back, even if there are a few odd things about them today. The insides are the same (except Mr. Dizzy and I haven't checked all of the books so I can't promise everyone else has escaped this treatment).

They come highly recommended (by me). They have been translated into 20 languages, so you should be seeing some near you! In fact, you are reading this in English so I would recommend you look for the English ones. They are the first and best!

Let me know what you think.

Picks

Here are two recommendations for you.

One is Don Markstein's Toonopedia, a "vast repository of toonological knowledge", or, in other words, lots of information about cartoons. Very important in my opinion.

I also found an all-around panoramic view of the Forbidden City in China. You need Quicktime to view it (download free here). Just click on a circle where you want to have a look, then when it has loaded, move the cursor and you will be able to see all sorts of things!

I hope you find them interesting. I have just taught my computer to write in Japanese, so you are lucky you can read this at all! It wants me to write only in Japanese and never in English now! Eek!

Why have I done this? Because I have a sideline-blog at mixi. There is not much to read there, also you can't read it unless you are a member! And you can't read it unless you can read Japanese...or can guess the right buttons to click (like me...). But I thought I would mention it!

さようなら！

I would like to think you could read those characters in your browser...I wonder if you can? If not, they say: sayoonara! - goodbye!

Identity

I have heard of two young pianists who changed their names.

One did it because there was already a pianist with the same name.

The other seemingly changed his name because his real name wasn't very interesting. I'm not sure about that, but certainly his new choice of name was much more exotic!

Actually, both names were changed to a more "exotic" one. Exotic means foreign, non-English, basically. The classic example was the American pianist Olga Samaroff (1880-1948, born Lucy Mary Olga Agnes Hickenlooper, in Texas). She later married Leopold Stokowski (1882-1977), who, though he had a Polish name and an indeterminate Mid-East-European accent, was from London. I know he was, there is a plaque about him on a school just up the road from my house. Actually it appears that Stokowski, despite having an exotic name, accent, hairstyle, etc, actually changed his name to a less exotic one! If what I read is correct, he was born Antoni Stanisław Bolesławowicz. I guess the public wouldn't have known what to do with that name. Well, I'm not a Stokowski biography expert (did you guess?) so we will have to leave him there for now.

What I was thinking was, if there was another pianist called Philip Howard, what would I do? You know, the genuine answer to that is I would expect him to change his name. I wonder what that tells you about me? I must be very egotistical! But not as much as people who take fake identitites. After all, they must be proud people who try to protect the new myth of themselves - so that nobody notices how boring they really are.

Except you, Leopold! Because, of course, the truth is everyone is a lot more interesting than they realise. If only they would have more confidence in themselves!

You heard it here first.

Weather, oh!

I have been checking the weather forecast for a few weeks.

Always it says that in two or three days the temperature will go up higher by a few degrees.

Then when the day arrives, nothing has changed - in two or three days the temperature will go up higher by a few degrees! Oh, why do they torture me so?

But, as you know, the weather is not predictable over longer than two or three days on the whole.

Seemingly the weather forecast is entirely predictable!

Rain is good but I do prefer the sunshine. Which I am unlikely to see in London very often!

Where else should I go? Any suggestions? You could form a Philip Howard Escape Committee. Those who want me further away, send in the name of a suitable place. Those who want me nearer, write in with the name of the place where you live.

I wonder where I would end up like that? Anyway, I know you are too polite to make suggestions like that. You will just have to wait and see.

Now, which way is the sun going? I should follow that.

I heard that Alexander the Great went to see the Greek philosopher Diogenes. Diogenes lived in a barrel and was lying down next to it when Alexander came. He said to Diogenes,"I am ruler of half the world. Whatever you ask of me, it shall be done. Now what do you wish?" and Diogenes said please could you move a bit to the right, you're blocking my sun...

You know, a barrel rolls. It must be a good way of following the sun. I wonder if that's a possibility?

What did the barrel have in it before Diogenes? Wine? Fish? Heraclitus? It makes all the difference to the internal ambience.

But I guess the sun is always the same, eh? When you can see it.

RRRaaaaAAAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!

If you have a look at Big Cat Rescue, a sanctuary for rehabilitated tigers, lions, leopards, etc, you can learn all sorts of things.

There are lots of tips for dealing with big cats (some can be applied to domestic cats). If you are expecting to have any dealings with lions or tigers...

If a tiger bites your hand, then

1) You are in a tricky situation, be careful
2) If you try to pull your hand away, the teeth will go further in

So you have to "feed him your hand". He might let go if he feels your hand going too far down his throat. I mean, he wants your hand to go down his throat, but not while it is still on your arm and is causing him discomfort.

So there's a useful piece of advice!

But what I wanted to write about was what they call "Enrichments". These are things they do at the sanctuary to try to stop the cats getting bored. They spray smells on logs, like vanilla or star anise. Then the animals get interested in this mysterious scent and rub against the logs. Or they put some meat in a cardboard tube, so the cat can "find" the food inside, as if she caught it herself. There are lots of things. They give them pumpkins too sometimes!

I think that's what we need. Enrichments.

Something to give us a bit of fun.

Can you think of anything?

Thievery

I've been reading about Stradivarius violins.

They are famous for their sound, but I suppose they are more famous for their value. Of course they have a musical value as great instruments, but because of this they also have a monetary value.

There are up to about 700 Strads around in the world today.

First I read about one of the instruments David Oistrakh (1908-1974) played. He had others but this one is referred to as the "Oistrakh". It was made in 1671.

What did I read next? "Stolen in 1996 and still missing".

Yes, it was stolen and has not come to light.

Read on.

Le Maurien (1714) - stolen in 2002, still missing
Lipinski (1715) - missing since 1962
Colossus (1716) - stolen in 1998, still missing
Davidov-Morini (1727) - stolen in 1995, still missing
Herkules (1732) - this belonged to Ysaÿe, was stolen in 1908 and is still missing
The Ames (1734) and Lamoureux (1735) are still missing

Some thieves know how to steal but do not know how to look after what they steal. Sometimes things go wrong. Other types of accidents can happen too.

Can you believe that very valuable objects can be sold to private collectors, regardless of where they came from, and can be kept hidden?

That's another possibility.

I'm sorry to say that all kinds of things go on in the world, and some of them are not nice.

I'm not just talking about "owners" of stolen property. There are other kinds of illegal hobbies, I would imagine.

There are people alive today who are not nice people. We do not know them, I'm glad to say.

Some people are selfish. And some people are very selfish indeed.

How silly to take things for yourself. Does a fish try to keep its own private water, does an eagle breathe only its own private air? No, they are each free to travel where they can. They share it with many others.

Everything we have on this earth is for us. Not mine, not yours. We can't keep it, we can't just do what we like with it, we don't own it, we have to take care of it all. But it is for us. All of us! Together.

So when you take something and hide it for yourself, you are taking it from...yourself.

It was yours anyway! But you took it and concealed it. And then you couldn't share it with anyone, and that was no fun.

A bit sad.

But we don't have to be sad if we share!

You see? The violins can come out of their cupboards, and be heard. And then we can all hear them, and they will be ours again. Because a human made them. A human just like us. He made them from wood, which was living just like we are now. All part of our world, all knitted together like old clothes. Our world.

Not "me" and "them".

We, us!

Jingle Pot

I have a book called 1001 Natural Wonders You Must See Before You Die. I wish it were called 1001 Natural Wonders You Must See. Of course I will see them (if I do manage to see all 1001 of them) before I die. Or should all books change their titles now?

"OXFORD DICTIONARY OF ENGLISH - FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT DEAD"

"THE DA VINCI CODE - BESTSELLER, READ BY LIVING PEOPLE THROUGHOUT THE WORLD"

"THE PICKWICK PAPERS - THE TIMELESS FAVOURITE OF THOSE MILLIONS WHOSE FINGERS WERE ABLE TO GRASP ON TO LIFE SUFFICIENTLY TO BE ABLE TO TURN ITS PAGES"

The girl at the checkout looked at me with a funny look. As if she thought I was going to die in the next month! Maybe I accidentally picked the book out of the 'Terminal Illness' section? I don't think so.

I have seen several books called "Something Something, Blah Blah Blah, ...BEFORE YOU DIE". I suppose the publisher imagines the title will lend a certain urgency to your book browsing. You must buy the book ...BEFORE YOU DIE!

We could add it to all sorts of things we want to sell. Decoding Skin - Philip Howard's Solo Piano Album of Music to Listen to Before You Die!

Back to the 1001 Natural Wonders book. I didn't count them. I believe there are 1001. They said it, that's good enough for me. And they are all very natural and wonderful, just like it says.

I don't know the meanings of foreign place-names, but some of the English names are quite funny. Things are often odd or eccentric in England - it is good, one of the main positive features of this country in my opinion.

There was one I remembered. A cave somewhere. Pothole is a word for a hole in the road, or apparently also for a cave - a very big hole in the road, I suppose. That could explain a little bit about the funny name...

JINGLE POT

Well, I liked it!

Consulate

Remember me?

It was pointed out to me today that I said I'd be back in the blink of an eye. I did imply that it could be a long blink, so I think we can say I have been true to my word there.

Phrasebooks are useful. They are also quite funny sometimes. The old example was the phrase "My postilion has been struck by lightning". Very useful, eh?

I have here Collins' Greek Phrasebook compiled by Christopher Scott and first published in 1964. Perhaps a little quaint because it is old. Perhaps a little frightening as it demonstrates the frame of mind with which the Englishman approached travel in Greece at that time! (Haven't they heard of Byron?)

The Collins series is interesting from this period. Some phrases don't necessarily spring to mind, or certainly not to my mind. The Spanish book tells you how to say "He is a pansy" - a pejorative term for homosexual. I don't think I would say it in English - what are the chances of needing to say it in Spanish?

So let's open the pages of our Greek phrasebook and see what we want to say to the Greeks.

Good Morning.
Good Evening.

It starts well!


I beg your pardon.
Am I disturbing you?
I am terribly sorry.

Already several ways of saying sorry! Very important to the English then, and still is. Sorry!

Too dear.
Very cheap.
Quickly.
Slowly.
Gently.
Look out!
This way.
That way.
I am an Englishman.
What is the matter?
On the contrary.
Very well.
Whose turn is it?
It is not my fault.
I do my best.
Will this do?

A lovely little story. What was happening, you will have to decide. What about "I am an Englishman"? It sounds almost an admission of some shameful secret.

Now for the section called "General Difficulties". Always my favourite! Here we go:

I don't understand you.
Of course I don't, I'm English! We don't have foreign languages, you know. We do have phrasebooks though.

That man is following me everywhere.
Oh no, not that man! He was busy in 1964. Even if he only followed 10% of the people who bought this book.

I shall call a policeman.
I shall stay here.
(Threatening to occupy Greece?)
Help! Fire! Thief!
Who are you?
I don't know you.
I don't want to speak to you.
Leave me alone.
Go away.
That will do!
You are mistaken.
I didn't do it.
I will give you nothing.
It is very annoying.
It has nothing to do with me.
What have I done?
I have done nothing.
I have paid you.
I have paid you enough.
Let me pass.

A bit of excitement!

Many other useful phrases are presented in an interesting way. Those with lightning reflexes can grab their phrasebook, find the section for "Chemist and Hairdresser", read the Greek letters or use the imitated pronunciation system, and exclaim:

The water is too hot, you are scalding me!

I have been burnt by the sun would probably be obvious without the thought being spoken aloud. Also they were expecting it anyway.

A hundred Drachmas to win on...
Betting on horses? You don't get that in modern phrasebooks.

Does this street go to the Acropolis?
Did they ask that on every street?

We can see the travelling English at work fairly often:
I do not want anything with garlic in it.
We do not want retsina.

I have left my glasses in the toilet...
...was a bit puzzling for me. How did they get down the toilet?

Hey-ho, travelling was a strange business for us then. Not for everyone though. And you have to give them credit for trying with the phrases and everything (particularly if he was a pansy - was it the man who was following me everywhere?)

And if it all gets too much, if the prices are too high, the food too Greek, the language not English enough, then there is always one phrase standing by. The phrase of phrases. The cure-all:

Where is the British Consulate?

See you there!