Spaghetti Carbonara
We haven't had any recipes here yet, so here is the all-purpose Spaghetti Carbonara.
There are three transitional versions. This means our Carbonara exists in three perceptible discrete states, but you can actually choose to slide between them and make it taste however you like (but probably three is enough). The three versions are: Classic, Improved, Restaurant.
The Classic is quite dry, apart from the egg. Then you can 'Improve' this by adding some cream or milk or even more eggs, whatever you want to have a go with. I called the last one 'Restaurant' because the very creamy interpretation of Spaghetti Carbonara is the one I have always been given in restaurants. The creamy version is, as I see it, a bit old-fashioned, perhaps a bit reminiscent of the very rich food of the 1970s, and you will have to work hard to produce a good taste because the cream will be working hard to mask it and make it taste...of cream! The drier version is more lively and there is more contrast between tastes and colours. Use organic egg(s) and you will have a lovely colour of yellow in there.
The Recipe.
Spaghetti
You can buy dried spaghetti (the usual kind in plastic packets in a supermarket). If you do, the best I have had is made by De Cecco (blue and yellow packets). Fresh spaghetti can also be got, particularly from a specialist Italian food-type shop, but even in supermarkets sometimes. Otherwise you can make your own in your pasta-making machine or have your pasta chef prepare some in your large professional kitchen or country estate. How much you need is up to you. If it is dried, it will grow through cooking so start with less. I mean, just make it. If you don't have enough, you will be hungry. Too much, and you can have a party or eat it the next day (to do this, just put your finished spaghetti in a hot saucepan with a tiny bit of water in the bottom and stir it around until it is all hot - the water helps conduct the heat to the food and stops it being too dry).
Bacon
Most bacon is horrific nowadays. Despicable substances are injected into it to make it weigh more (money-making idea, or 'theft', as it should properly be known), and this is the white stuff that oozes out when you're frying bacon. It is not normal! It is an offence against creation! You've already had the pig killed to get your bacon, now please do not insult him and nature by perverting his bacon like this. If it is all that you can get, then make the most of it. Think good thoughts! The best quality bacon I have had (in my short life) was got in the UK and produced by Duchy Originals. It's expensive, though. I am just presenting the options though, there is no imperative to always buy the best. The cheapest food produced under the worst and most immoral conditions could be the best food of your life...if you were enjoying it right.
Egg
As before, cheap usually means something is being mistreated somewhere along the line. In this case it's the hens. You can research it if you want. I don't want to mention it today. The other thing is that organic, free range eggs look and taste better. In actual real life, 'organic' is not something weird and expensive. It just means "this food was grown the way food grows". Organic means growing. It is the basic way food is made if you don't abuse it. Why not go and live in a nice house somewhere with a garden and grow your own food. That will be organic and you will like it too. Send me some!
Lemon
You need some of the juice and also some of the zest (the peel on the outside). For the least poisonous zest, get an unwaxed lemon. (It will not kill you the other way, but the lemon itself tastes better than whatever they polish it with)
That's it. Instructions:
Cook spaghetti
In boiling water with a bit of salt in it (there are no quantities here, if it tastes wrong you have done it wrong! Too salty? Why not try adding LESS SALT. Etc.) The spaghetti is ready when you like the way it tastes. It is so simple. If it is too hard to bite then let it boil more. Too soft, you can't do anything now - eat it! If there is a bit of resistance when you bite it, it is known as 'al dente' but who cares, you are the one eating it.
Fry bacon from about halfway through spaghetti cooking
Hot pan, put in chopped bacon. When it looks good, it is done. Ths size of slice affects the taste-feeling, so try different sizes if you make this more than once.
Spaghetti cooked?
Then drain it and put it back in its pan. Chuck in the bacon and the egg. And a bit of lemon juice too (A bit! Less than half a lemon's juice. Have it ready! Don't get pips in it!). Stir it around, fast. It is hot so the egg will start to cook. You have eyes, look at it. Take it out before it looks completely right because it will continue to cook on the plate (the food is hot!). Have a go, at least.
Is it on the plate now?
Then grate the lemon zest and put it on top. Just some, the maximum is about half of half a lemon per plateful.
That is the classic version.
You can also make a wetter version by having a bowl ready in which you have beaten the egg with some cream (a little...a lot...too much) and lemon. You can put in more eggs too. Probably not too many though, it is not supposed to be a quiche. Then at the adding-egg stage above you add the creamy mixture instead. It will reduce (get thicker) in the heat, but will get a lot thicker if it is mostly egg, or get thicker more slowly if it is mostly cream (actually you could even have used some milk if you like - it is only thin cream after all).
That is it! You have made it! Amazing!
Now grind some black pepper on it when it is on the plate. You may grate Parmesan cheese on too if you should wish. But if you do, that is your recipe - it is not just something you add anyway (like people who put salt on everything without even tasting it). The lemon zest can go on this version too, if you like.
The End
There are three transitional versions. This means our Carbonara exists in three perceptible discrete states, but you can actually choose to slide between them and make it taste however you like (but probably three is enough). The three versions are: Classic, Improved, Restaurant.
The Classic is quite dry, apart from the egg. Then you can 'Improve' this by adding some cream or milk or even more eggs, whatever you want to have a go with. I called the last one 'Restaurant' because the very creamy interpretation of Spaghetti Carbonara is the one I have always been given in restaurants. The creamy version is, as I see it, a bit old-fashioned, perhaps a bit reminiscent of the very rich food of the 1970s, and you will have to work hard to produce a good taste because the cream will be working hard to mask it and make it taste...of cream! The drier version is more lively and there is more contrast between tastes and colours. Use organic egg(s) and you will have a lovely colour of yellow in there.
The Recipe.
Spaghetti
You can buy dried spaghetti (the usual kind in plastic packets in a supermarket). If you do, the best I have had is made by De Cecco (blue and yellow packets). Fresh spaghetti can also be got, particularly from a specialist Italian food-type shop, but even in supermarkets sometimes. Otherwise you can make your own in your pasta-making machine or have your pasta chef prepare some in your large professional kitchen or country estate. How much you need is up to you. If it is dried, it will grow through cooking so start with less. I mean, just make it. If you don't have enough, you will be hungry. Too much, and you can have a party or eat it the next day (to do this, just put your finished spaghetti in a hot saucepan with a tiny bit of water in the bottom and stir it around until it is all hot - the water helps conduct the heat to the food and stops it being too dry).
Bacon
Most bacon is horrific nowadays. Despicable substances are injected into it to make it weigh more (money-making idea, or 'theft', as it should properly be known), and this is the white stuff that oozes out when you're frying bacon. It is not normal! It is an offence against creation! You've already had the pig killed to get your bacon, now please do not insult him and nature by perverting his bacon like this. If it is all that you can get, then make the most of it. Think good thoughts! The best quality bacon I have had (in my short life) was got in the UK and produced by Duchy Originals. It's expensive, though. I am just presenting the options though, there is no imperative to always buy the best. The cheapest food produced under the worst and most immoral conditions could be the best food of your life...if you were enjoying it right.
Egg
As before, cheap usually means something is being mistreated somewhere along the line. In this case it's the hens. You can research it if you want. I don't want to mention it today. The other thing is that organic, free range eggs look and taste better. In actual real life, 'organic' is not something weird and expensive. It just means "this food was grown the way food grows". Organic means growing. It is the basic way food is made if you don't abuse it. Why not go and live in a nice house somewhere with a garden and grow your own food. That will be organic and you will like it too. Send me some!
Lemon
You need some of the juice and also some of the zest (the peel on the outside). For the least poisonous zest, get an unwaxed lemon. (It will not kill you the other way, but the lemon itself tastes better than whatever they polish it with)
That's it. Instructions:
Cook spaghetti
In boiling water with a bit of salt in it (there are no quantities here, if it tastes wrong you have done it wrong! Too salty? Why not try adding LESS SALT. Etc.) The spaghetti is ready when you like the way it tastes. It is so simple. If it is too hard to bite then let it boil more. Too soft, you can't do anything now - eat it! If there is a bit of resistance when you bite it, it is known as 'al dente' but who cares, you are the one eating it.
Fry bacon from about halfway through spaghetti cooking
Hot pan, put in chopped bacon. When it looks good, it is done. Ths size of slice affects the taste-feeling, so try different sizes if you make this more than once.
Spaghetti cooked?
Then drain it and put it back in its pan. Chuck in the bacon and the egg. And a bit of lemon juice too (A bit! Less than half a lemon's juice. Have it ready! Don't get pips in it!). Stir it around, fast. It is hot so the egg will start to cook. You have eyes, look at it. Take it out before it looks completely right because it will continue to cook on the plate (the food is hot!). Have a go, at least.
Is it on the plate now?
Then grate the lemon zest and put it on top. Just some, the maximum is about half of half a lemon per plateful.
That is the classic version.
You can also make a wetter version by having a bowl ready in which you have beaten the egg with some cream (a little...a lot...too much) and lemon. You can put in more eggs too. Probably not too many though, it is not supposed to be a quiche. Then at the adding-egg stage above you add the creamy mixture instead. It will reduce (get thicker) in the heat, but will get a lot thicker if it is mostly egg, or get thicker more slowly if it is mostly cream (actually you could even have used some milk if you like - it is only thin cream after all).
That is it! You have made it! Amazing!
Now grind some black pepper on it when it is on the plate. You may grate Parmesan cheese on too if you should wish. But if you do, that is your recipe - it is not just something you add anyway (like people who put salt on everything without even tasting it). The lemon zest can go on this version too, if you like.
The End
